I think that if we as parents can teach our kids that there is a big difference between having sex and making love, it will go along way in helping our kids mature. Sex results from raging hormones, peer pressure, partner pressure, or just the desire to have a few moments of passion or momentary pleasure. Making love is a mutually fulfilling experience between two committed people that care deeply about each other.
Although we are all sexual beings and we were born with the need to have sex, it's important that kids understand that making love is healthy and wonderful, and is something that can deepen a relationship. Having sex on the other hand is not a healthy emotional activity for teens.
When having the sex talk with kids, in addition to talking about the need for safe sex and the consequences, we should explain the difference between sex and making love. This helps instill in the child a true sense of what sexuality is all about. When a person loses their virginity, it is something they cannot get back and it's also a time that they will always remember. Having good memories about making love is much better than having regrets about having sex as they get older.
Showing posts with label good sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label good sex. Show all posts
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Europeans Treatment of Teen Sex vs Americans
I recently read an article which stated that Americans look at teen sex as a risky experience while the Europeans feel that teen sex is a pleasurable experience. I think the Europeans hit the nail on the head. The only caveat that I'm making in this post is that, teen sex should be safe and consensual.
Although I'm sure even in Europe that parents don't encourage their children to have sex, they realize that if it happens there is nothing wrong with it. Bravo. What is so wrong with children seeking pleasure? It's a normal desire for both children and adults. Many adults seek pleasure through many activities such as smoking, drinking, laughter, and yes sex. So why can't we understand that children have the same need to seek pleasure just like us. When children are young they seek their physical pleasure from sucking their thumbs, and having a "binkie," and as they grow they learn about masturbation. After the onset of puberty teens tend to seek out different ways to seek out physical pleasure. Kissing and hugging becomes more of the norm after puberty. And then Sex can become an important form of pleasure for teens.
There is not a "magical age" where young adults can have sex, children mature differently. It is our responsibility as parents to accept our children's needs for pleasure as they grow up and to talk to them and prepare them emotionally to be responsible and safe in the activities they undertake.
So Moms and Dads out there, can you accept the fact that we all have a desire for physical pleasure, even our kids? Do you think like the Europeans or do you have the mindset of most Americans? It's all up to us as parents to determine what is best for our own children, for me, I say what's so wrong with good safe consensual sex?
Although I'm sure even in Europe that parents don't encourage their children to have sex, they realize that if it happens there is nothing wrong with it. Bravo. What is so wrong with children seeking pleasure? It's a normal desire for both children and adults. Many adults seek pleasure through many activities such as smoking, drinking, laughter, and yes sex. So why can't we understand that children have the same need to seek pleasure just like us. When children are young they seek their physical pleasure from sucking their thumbs, and having a "binkie," and as they grow they learn about masturbation. After the onset of puberty teens tend to seek out different ways to seek out physical pleasure. Kissing and hugging becomes more of the norm after puberty. And then Sex can become an important form of pleasure for teens.
There is not a "magical age" where young adults can have sex, children mature differently. It is our responsibility as parents to accept our children's needs for pleasure as they grow up and to talk to them and prepare them emotionally to be responsible and safe in the activities they undertake.
So Moms and Dads out there, can you accept the fact that we all have a desire for physical pleasure, even our kids? Do you think like the Europeans or do you have the mindset of most Americans? It's all up to us as parents to determine what is best for our own children, for me, I say what's so wrong with good safe consensual sex?
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