An old high school girlfriend was in town for the holidays and we had a chance to catch up over a few drinks. As we were reminiscing over some of our high school episodes she brought up "planters hill" which really wasn't a hill but it's the place everyone "back in the day" went to make out with their boyfriends. Sadly Planters Hill is now a development.
But as we laughed and drank our wine we talked about our exploits in the backseats of our boyfriend's cars and I thought it would be a good subject to blog about. Nooooo I'm not going into the x rated details so if that's what you were looking for you will be disappointed. It does however bring up the subject about teens and how many teens did and still do experience their sexuality.
For many teens, the back seat of the car is really the only place they can have their privacy to engage in intimate relations. Again I'm not advocating that teens have sex, I'm just stating that if teens want to have sex they are going to. But is this where we want our teens to learn about and experience sex? First off it's not a very comfortable environement (unless the teens are gymnasts) and parking in a deserted area is not a very safe place to engage in this type of activity. In addition, having intimate relations while constantly listening for other cars or the noises in the dark, definitely takes much of the romance out of a romantic situation.
Now I'm sure there are some parents that believe that the more uncomfortable the situation is the less likeley the teens will be to have sex. But remembering my jaded past, tells me that the sex will still occur but it will be more of a purely sexual act than a passionate romantic loving encounter.
As I've said before, I have always wanted my girls to understand and experience the beauty of having sex once they were in committed and loving relationships. Anyone that has read any of my posts knows that I don't condone teen sex but I do accept that it will happen, and I want my kids to know that sex can be wonderful, fun, healthy and fulfilling.
So do we want our kids to experience physical intimacy in the backseat of a car or should we allow them their privacy to enjoy and explore their sexuality in a safe and comfortable environment?
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3 comments:
I am all for the safe environment. I too remember trying to find alone time with my boyfriend as a teenager and mostly it was the backseat of a car (a hatchback none the less).
Scaring the teens doesn't work - education and reality does. How many teen have come up pregnant because they were afraid to talk to their parents ?!
I would rather have them at home were they are safe than parked out one the side of a mountain where anything can happen.
As we speak my daughter has her boyfriend over and they are in her room. I at first didn't know he was over and kind of burst in to put some of her clothes away. I scared them but all they were doing was laying fully clothed on her bed, staring at each other. Mwahahahahaha I usually knock so I apologized for bursting in she just laughed and rolled her eyes.
She has always told me she is not ready and I believe her. I asked her to let me know when she was. Hopefully she will do that.
But for now I am glad they are both home in a safe warm house, as it is very snowy outside.
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